Unfortunate news, Guardsman! The entire editorial staff of the Regimental Standard has been drafted to the front lines on Loebos due to a shortage of manpower*. In their absence, we […]
Unfortunate news, Guardsman! The entire editorial staff of the Regimental Standard has been drafted to the front lines on Loebos due to a shortage of manpower*. In their absence, we have decided to reprint a particularly inspiring article from a past issue, looking at the Imperium’s previous victory in Ultramar – our defeat of the Tyranids!
STRANGE XENOS BEASTS DEFEATED ON MACRAGGE!
Salutations, Guardsman! The so called “Tyrannic Menace” has been defeated once and for all on Macragge, thanks to the brave efforts of the Ultramarines. We’re sure that if Roboute Guilliman still walked, he would feel nothing but pride at the Imperium. Let our efforts here stand as a warning to our enemies never to assault Ultramar again!
Who Were the Tyrannic Menace?
First seen on the world of Tyran, the Tyran-ites** were a barbaric species of xenos similar to the Megarachnids exterminated by the forces of the Emperor in M31. While the Tyran-ite vanguard has been destroyed at Macragge, some still remain at large in the Eastern Ultima Segmentum, and there is a small chance that you will encounter some on your way to other, more pressing engagements. We have prepared this guide to make dispatching these galactic vermin as simple as possible.
Known Genus of Tyran-ite
These large, Centaur-like xenos appeared in advance of the Tyran-ite fleet, attempting to negotiate with Imperial forces and claiming to be refugees. Thankfully, we were able to see through their obvious deception – remember Guardsman, never trust anything with more than four limbs!
Such is the depravity of our foes that they resorted to using wild beasts in combat, utterly unarmoured and utterly unprepared for combat with the Imperium. The Hunter-slayers are around the size of dogs, and just as lacking in lethality*** – simply take advantage of the superior technology of your lasgun to defeat them at range.
The Tyran-ite race is led by a larger genus of Hunter-slayer, known as a Warrior. These beasts appear to communicate non-verbally, most likely by secreting pheromones. The death of these creatures appears to be deeply distressing to the smaller Tyran-ites – it is believed that they have some kind of sentimental connection to one another. Like the rest of the species, Warriors are unarmoured and easily dispatched with a bayonet strike between their chitin plating.****
Rather than use tanks, the Tyran-ites instead employ large beasts of burden. The scything talons on these beasts are not nearly sharp enough to pierce the aegis of your flak armour, and their distinctive scream, while distressing, poses no harm to you – take any opportunity to get right in front of the Screamer-killer and shove a krak grenade down its throat!*****
COMMONLY MISIDENTIFIED AS TYRAN-ITE: Genestealers
While they possess some superficial similarity to the untrained eye, Genestealers have nothing in common with the Tyran-ites, having been encountered long before the Fall of Tyran.
There you have it, Guardsmen! There is nothing to fear from the perfidious xenos if you keep yourself armed with faith, knowledge and a lasgun. Thanks to soldiers like you******, we can rest easy knowing that at least one xenos threat is gone for good.
Thought for the day: “The alien dream is to dance on the grave of mankind.”
* And as punishment for “The Derych Incident”
** Name currently pending Adeptus Administratum approval
*** A note to hive-based regiments: a “dog” is a large mammal resembling an overgrown rat, known for loyalty, obedience and faithfulness – traits you would do well to emulate.
**** The Tyran-ite forces on Macragge were led by a large Warrior designated “the Swarmlord”. Thankfully, this vile beast was easily dispatched thanks to the valorous efforts of Chapter Master Marneus Calgar, leaving the forces of the enemy permanently leaderless.
***** Please note that replacement prosthetic limbs will only be issued following successful extermination of a Screamer-killer. There is a thin line between bravery and a careless expenditure of your Emperor-given extremities.
****** But mostly thanks to the Ultramarines.