Have you lost your lasgun? Are you aware that doing so is a grievous offence?
Due to a series of losses in your sector, we have deemed it prudent to reprint the Lasgun Replacement Form for your personal use – we can’t have you charging into battle without a weapon, can we?*
We hope you never have recourse to use this form, Guardsman, and that if you do, your experience is a pleasant and efficient one!
++Thought for the day: “None are innocent, there are only varying degrees of guilt.”++
* Or going around without something to affix your bayonet to!