SEE THE GALAXY
Ever wanted to see a tree? Or the sky? Or just curious about what those things are? In the Astra Militarum, you’ll have the chance to explore the world beyond the confines of the underhive.*
REGULARLY SCHEDULED BEATINGS
Tired of the disorganised, seemingly random beatings doled out in the custody of the Enforcers? In the Astra Militarum, you can rest assured that all corporal punishment will be delivered according to a precise schedule, and accompanied with an appropriate litany from the Imperial Creed for you to reflect on and grow from.
GENEROUS SPATIAL ALLOWANCES
As a member of the Astra Militarum, you’ll be entitled to a far more generous spatial allocation than most prisoners of the Enforcers. Thanks to recent infrastructure improvements, more than 60% of barracks rooms and ship berths are tall enough to stand up in** and shared with no more than an Infantry Squad of individuals.***
CLOSE PERSONAL MENTORING
Here in the Astra Militarum, we know that people matter. You won’t be the victim of brutality at the hands of a faceless authority – instead, you’ll be closely watched by a specially trained personnel manager known as a Commissar. Through a carefully tailored programme of self-improvement, you’ll be able to realise your full potential and, eventually, find a meaningful death in the name of the Emperor.
Invoke your Right of Conscription today, Criminal – and start a new, better existence!****
++ Thought For The Day: Even A Man Who Has Nothing To Offer Can Still Give His Life ++
* Following a probationary rotation clearing out particularly unsightly mutant tribes from the bowels of a number of starships.
** Assuming the average height of an Imperial Guardsman (3ft), based on a survey of several regiments from Ornsworld.
*** Please note – size of Infantry Squad may change based on mission parameters, mid-campaign mergers, and warp-based personal replication.
**** Preferably before the Enforcers finish interrogating you – the Guard would prefer you with all your fingernails and teeth!