Failure will not be tolerated, Guardsmen, but it can be corrected.
We have some bad news, and some good news.
The bad news is that the Most Holy Adepts of the Departmento Munitorum have received disturbing reports from War Zone Charadon about a lack of strategic coordination between the glorious Astra Militarum and the holy warriors of the Adeptus Mechanicus. This failing has led to several instances of valuable ordnance being wasted on friendly targets.
These complaints have been subject to a thorough and entirely impartial investigation by the office of the Fabricator General, and it has been concluded that this is your fault. The Adeptus Mechanicus use advanced technology that allows near-instantaneous communication of orders, and as a lowly Guardsman, you are unable to access this “noospheric network” due to flaws in your biology.
The good news is that we can provide a solution.
The Adeptus Mechanicus are offering a new vocational program that will allow you to better interface with their soldiers in battle. Not only will you link directly into their command structure, but your body will be enhanced as an added bonus.
Some of you may be concerned that this process can result in the loss of unimportant biological features like free will and knees, but rest assured that the increased durability and potential to carry heavy weapons into battle will render you more able to serve the Emperor than ever before.
This process is open to all Guardsmen – just ask your commanding officer for a referral to “Project Kataphron”. Please note that the procedure is irreversible and Guardsmen will be expected to find a suitable substitute for their absence. Failure to do so will be punished by conversion into a servitor.