Required weekly reading for the modern guardsman
Attention, Guardsmen! The Regimental Standard this week brings you an urgent update regarding your lasgun! Following several complaints* from Guardsmen concerning their weapons, an investigation has revealed an operating fault […]
Congratulations, Guardsmen! Following 88% regimental depletion due to excessive valour in your last campaign, your unit is being incorporated into the Ventrillian Nobles. We are sure many of you have […]
Attention, Guardsmen! The might of the Astra Militarum is built on the backs of its great heroes – the living legends who prosecute the Emperor’s will and bring justice to […]
Attention, Guardsmen! You are about to embark upon a pacification campaign designed to bring several worlds back into compliance. This will give you the opportunity to bring the Emperor’s justice […]
Attention, Guardsman! While even attempting to understand the xenos is to court madness, it has come to our attention that regimental combat efficacy has recently been unacceptably low when engaging […]
Wonderful news, Guardsmen! As you know, many regiments have been assigned to assist the Adeptus Mechanicus with their ongoing geological survey. In a stroke of complete coincidence, many of the […]
Excellent news, Guardsmen! While the Cicatrix Maledictum has provided all manner of opportunities for heroism, all good things must come to an end. Today, Adeptus Mechanicus Explorator Fleets are happy […]
Attention, Guardsmen! Following your reassignment to the Damocles Gulf, it has been deemed necessary to provide an edifying course on the perfidious T’au in order to properly sharpen your hate, […]
Attention, Guardsmen! It has recently come to our attention that an above-average number of you are claiming that your Primer and your training are leaving you unprepared for life on […]
Excellent news, Guardsmen! Following some unexpected delays*, we are happy to announce the canonisation of one of our most beloved Guardsmen. We are, of course, referring to Colonel** Jenkins – […]
Attention, Guardsmen! We have some excellent news. While we understand you were on your way to perform supply and ordnance security detail on the garden world of Bucolia IX, your […]
Attention, Guardsmen! Could you be a mutant? While one of humanity’s great strengths is its biodiversity, there is a narrow line between useful adaptation and warp-tainted aberration. Constant vigilance is […]
Attention Guardsman! How are YOU spending your assigned recreational periods? Recreation is useful only inasmuch as human frailty does not allow for constant labour. Your time away from the front […]
Attention, Guardsman! Is there anything more vile that an abhuman? Yes. Some abhumans are ALSO witches. Our recent efforts in combat have, mathematically speaking, annihilated the entire fighting strength of […]
Attention, Guardsman! Physical fitness is imperative for all Guardsman. You must demonstrate speed, strength and agility on the field of battle, whether you’re loading shells, leading a charge or throttling […]
Attention, Guardsman! Following some brief issues with the Ordo Chronos and time dilation in your sector due to warp activity, we are happy to declare this Standard Terran Year is […]
